I’m not someone who responds well to gimmicks, especially when it comes to beer. I have shuddered at chick beer, beer for the gays, dog beer, and caffeinated beer, and now we can add another painful marketing-idea-in-a-can: Pong Beer. Yes, it’s a light lager brewed specifically for putting into red solo cups and throwing balls at. God help us all.
According to the sales tear sheet posted on the Dallas Observer, every 30 pack comes with two ping pong balls, and the “RELOAD 22” bundle includes two 30 packs of beer, 16 Solo cups and four ping pong balls, so time-strapped college kids “will no longer need to go to multiple stores to get everything they need to play.” The goal here is obviously to simplify beer-pong-supply shopping, leaving college kids extra time to study and become better students. Or not. The tear sheet goes onto to boast “Our balls and cups provide an extra 60% gross profit” for the retailer. That sounds more like it.
This is wrong on many levels. First up, America doesn’t need another average light beer, and by most accounts, that’s what that is. Second, while the median age of college students has risen as people head back to school during the Great Recession, the typical college student still doesn’t reach the drinking age until junior or senior year, which makes the fact that Pong Beer is aimed at college kids slightly distasteful, in a Joe Camel kind of way. Finally, I’ve whined here in the past that many beer pong competitions don’t even use beer in the glasses – they use water – making this whole concept of a beer for playing beer pong with even dumber.
Oh, and did I mention I hate gimmick beers?
I can’t wait until I can gleefully write a follow up post about how this stuff has tanked, as we all know that day is coming. Hopefully sooner rather than later.