Sip, Chug, Pour is a game where we provide three beers, and you tell us in the comments which beer you’d savor slowly (Sip), which you’d blast down your gullet (Chug), and which you’d share with your imaginary friend who lives in your sink (Pour). You also should let us know WHY you chose the way you did, as the reasoning behind the decisions is what makes the game fun.
Today’s contestants are all interesting DIPAs, with descriptions I’ve stolen from Joe Tucker’s excellent site RateBeer.com. You can click on each to learn more about them over there, just in case you live under a rock (or a Keystone):
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This might be easy for some, but it got a little weird for me as I reasoned through it.
Here are my answers, you can write yours below:
Sip: Avery Maharaja – forget all the Pliny hype, I love the enormous malt backbone that props this puppy up and the big, boozy finish. There’s no way I’m giving it to Franz (that’s what I named my imaginary sink-dwelling buddy), and there’s no way I’m pounding a beer packing this much heat – it has a 10.5% ABV. Besides, it’s my favorite of the trio, so it gets full girlfriend experience. (I think that came out wrong).
Chug: This is where things get more difficult, because I don’t want to pour either of the remaining beers down the drain. Pouring a Pliny is like giving your wife the TV remote (both are sins that I cannot think of any good reasons to commit), and Heady Topper will clog the drain with all the floaties it has on board – that stuff looks like homebrew! As the ABV’s are equal (neither wins by being “lighter” than the other), I’m gonna chug the Pliny. Then maybe I’ll burn a $100 bill just to show how gangsta I’m livin’ yo. Chuggin’ Pliny, burnin’ Benjamin’s, showing respect to females…wait…aww, I suck at being gangsta!
Pour: That leaves Heady Topper to go down the drain. I’d be sad to see it go, but it would probably do wonders for kick-starting the enzyme action in my septic system. Seriously, this stuff looks like it belongs in a yeast lab!
So that’s how I’d roll, what about you?
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Beer & Whiskey Brothers 
You’re spot on with my choices, only with different justifications. I would sip Maharaja and chug the Elder because I think Maharaja is a much better beer and I like the Younger better than the Elder.
Heady Topper goes down the drain just because I haven’t had it yet, and there’s no way I’m pouring the other two.
I’m surprised that you wouldn’t sacrifice a chug with the Elder for a chance to taste Heady Topper. Plus, it comes in a can, perfect for shotgunning! I didn’t even think about that when I formulated my answers. Hmm…
If I didn’t like Heady Topper, then I’d kick myself for pouring the Pliny down the drain 😉
Sip: Heady Topper, because I haven’t had it yet.
Chug: Maharaja, because it sometimes reminds me of a refreshing bowl of tropical fruit (Pineapple and Mango, mostly).
Pour: Pliny the Elder, but only if I could do it in front of the douchenozzle who claims that “Pliny is the only beer I’ll drink,” and always tries to buy out my local liquor store’s allotment. Screw that guy.
Ha ha – you could videotape that pour and become Internet-famous as The Pliny Killer. That guy would totally think you were awesome, tell all of his friends, and STILL beat you to the store for a replacement bottle!
Jim is a douche. No way to dump Heady Topper, it’s hard to get and you can get Pliny (on the West Coast) and Maharaja anytime.
Sip: Heady
Chug: Pliny- I’ve chugged it after hot summer runs
Pour- Maharaja…my store might have 10+ more.
It’s tough for me to get any of the three,and of all the beers mentioned, Heady Topper is the only one I have in my fridge right now.
It should be drank fresh Jim!
Only been in there for four days!
Ditto. Jim is NUTZ.
Damn, I haven’t had any of these. I guess it would be this:
Sip: Pliny because I really really really want to try it out and the obvious hype.
Chug: Maharaja because i love Avery beers enough that if I HAD to then I would chug it instead of pour.
Pour: Heady Topper because I have heard good things, but this is the last beer so I gotta D:
No one’s drinking the Heady!!
I’d sip Pliny and only Pliny for the rest of my life and never get tired of it. One of the great things about having moved from NY to SF in November! I’ll need to find a way to get my hands on some of the Younger though, I’ve heard that’s pure bliss.
This is blasphemy. I would sip all three and lie to you about chugging and drain-pouring.
That goes totally against the spirit of the game, but I gotta admit – its a great answer.
My thoughts exactly–lets not and say we did.