What you see above is a game of one-handed Pabst Blue Ribbon football. The rules are simple: you always MUST have a beer in your hand (and if you drop, you gotta chug), tackles are made by one-handed touch, and the first team to 70 points wins.
It’s been played by a group of friends from Emerson, Iowa on every Thanksgiving Day for the past 10 years, a fun way to reconnect with each other and have their own unique tradition.
But it shouldn’t be unique – it should be an entire professional league, if only for the sponsorship opportunities. The PBR Farmers from Emerson would obviously be one of the league’s founding teams, but there’s tons of room for growth.
Dale’s Destroyers would hit you like a sackful of hops. The Bud Bruisers would be a lot like the Dallas Cowboys of old, outspending everyone in order to get the best players, and they’d have the finest practice facilities. They’d constantly be running up against the 21st-ers – that band of bitter Americans from the Bay Area – for a shot at the title. Of course the Sixpoint Sentinels would tower over the competition like the tall boys they are, owning the East, at least until the Ashville Expatriates (a mixed sixer of brands from other areas) rise to become a dominant force for years to come.
We NEED TO MAKE THIS HAPPEN!
In the meantime, let us know what team you’d be rooting for in the comments. Does Surly sell their stuff in cans? Because Minnesota needs a franchise!